Mechanical Engineering Personal Statement Example 5

From a very young age, I had aspirations of becoming an engineer, because I wanted to build machines that did not require direct human energy inputs to operate.

I achieved this for the first time a few weeks later, designing a vehicle that carried it's energy stored in rubber-bands; it wasn't a roaring success, but the fact that it wasn't perfect only increased my desire to learn more about engineering.

Soon afterwards, I became a serious motor sport enthusiast, and to understand the sport more, I began assisting my dad and his mechanic in the maintenance of our family cars and electricity generator. I quickly learnt and understood the function of every part of the generator and before long, my dad ran out of answers to my questions, like: 'Why do high performance engines often have up to six valves per cylinder when two would do the job?'. He therefore encouraged me to read further about engineering, and a few books later, I knew what I was devoting my life to.

The more I learn about mechanical engineering, the more assured I become that a career as a mechanical engineer is suited to me. A few years ago whilst researching for a physics assignment, I discovered that most cars are 20 to 30 percent efficient at best.

This statistic is unacceptable, and it had a big influence on my decision to study mechanical engineering, with my focus being engine design. In addition, learning subsequently of the rotary engine, continuously variable transmission (cvt), pneumatic and desmodromic valve control, hydraulics and many other interesting concepts has further trengthened my decision to study mechanical engineering, and it is my belief that I really can make a mark in the automobile industry.

After deciding to become an engineer, I set out to find the qualities necessary for success. In the process, I read about Heinrich Maybach, Thomas Edison, Isambard Brunel, Ernst von Siemens, and a host of others. Of all the great engineers I have learnt about, the one that inspires me the most is Thomas Edison. This is because unlike all the others, he not only was talented as an engineer; he was also a brilliant businessman.

I believe that success, as an engineer in this day and age, requires technical competence and a combination of management, leadership, communication and business skills.

Leadership is something that I have naturally and my school recognised this by appointing me a senior prefect, which I believe has further improved my leadership and communication skills. In addition, I recently set up a maths club in my school where sixth-formers who are good at maths help pupils from the junior school with their study and homework. This has improved my communication and presentation skills tremendously.

Reading Robert Kiyosaki's book, 'Rich Dad, Poor Dad', taught me the importance of having financial and business skills. To improve these skills, I volunteered at my local British Heart Foundation shop for a few months, to understand how charities make money. This turned out to be a very valuable educational experience.

When I have time outside my curricular and club activities, I am a very enthusiastic sportsperson. My main sporting interests are football and the high jump. Presently, I am in the process of starting up a football team for the sixth-formers in my school, to improve general physical fitness and to foster a sense of belonging among the new sixth-formers in my school.

I am also working towards a sports leadership award. In addition, I am involved in Greenwich council's Gifted and Talented program called 'xtrahot', and I have attended a number of seminars and workshops as part of the program.

It is my hope that a degree from your university would serve as a solid base for a successful career in engineering, where hopefully, I would be involved in the development of new technology for cleaner and more efficient transportation systems.

Profile info

This personal statement was written by mailforabu for application in 2005.

mailforabu's university choices
University of Bath
Oxford University
University College London

Green: offer made
Red: no offer made

Degree
Mechanical Engineering at University of Bath

mailforabu's Comments

It's not fantastic but it got me an interview at Oxford, so it can't be completely rubbish either.
My interviewers seemed to be particularly pleased with the question in paragraph two about engine valves, so I'll advice you guys to put something personal like that.
In addition, engineers like nothing better than talking about other great engineers. So if you can, include a few names your familiar with.
Finally, put some effort into your conclusion, and resist the temptation to drop it completely.

Ratings

Statement rating:****

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Comments

Very good statement and gud

Very good statement and gud luk to u m8.

But havin said that how can you want to devote your life to engineering when you are 6.

You wouldn't even know what engineering was when you were 6.

I hope not all statements are this full of overexagerated lied or i don't stand a chance.

It very good.

It very good.
I like your tips showing what you had done well.
BTW to other people he never mentioned about being six.

Oxford

I didn't get into Oxford because I wasn't prepared for the interview, not because of my personal statement. If you're applying to oxford, I'll advise you to brush up on your calculus, mechanics and electronics, at least that was what my interviews covered.
Although an offer from Oxford would have been nice, I don't regret not getting one cos they're crap at engineering, espescially compared to Bath, Cambridge and Imperial.
Goodluck with your applications.
Ab.

Age

How do you get from 'a very young age' to a few weeks later? A few weeks later than being a very young age?

spelling

Oxford would have been more inclined to offer you a place if you proof read your statement. Strengthened was incorrect, silly mistake but they would have picked up on it otherwise very good.

"it is my belief that I

"it is my belief that I really can make a mark in the automobile industry"

I'd question the effectiveness/value of this line. Your enthusiasm is great but (whilst you may well make your mark) perhaps it's best to dim down the wishful thinking - I doubt the admissions people would be overly impressed with it.

Certainly, a line stating your hopes to simply persue the career would get my preference.

All the best.

wat AS grades did u send with

wat AS grades did u send with this statement?

hey good essay....btw did you

hey good essay....btw did you apply to any american universities???

that was great personal

that was great personal statement. i apply for mechanical engineering this year. can you help me to do personal statement.
my email :kira2kun@hotmail.com

:)

wellll doneeee

btw does anyone know if unis can look at our AS results or just our predicted grades?

x

wow

lessen am going uni this next year an i need 2 do my p.s so if you can help me i will really like that thanks. joshualamidi@hotmail.com

"son what do you want to do

"son what do you want to do when ur older a fireman or something" his reply "no dad i want to be an engineer" haha i call bulsh*t and your out

valves

can i ask why do high performance have 6 valves for cylinder and not 2.

valves

can i ask why do high performance engines have 6 valves per cylinder and rather than 2.

Its a great personal

Its a great personal statement. I think everyone else over here is jealous. well done dude

hi

i will be applying for university 2010 and i am kind of lost writing my personal statement
so could you please help me
mohamedelmi288@hotmail.com
thank you

Why do high perfomance

Why do high perfomance engines have 6 valves instead of 2? It is important that you share your knowledge since you're such an intelligent individual. Through this, the whole world could benefit from knowing the answer to that question. ty.

Good statement btw.

Good statement btw.

Someone said jelous, then yes

Someone said jelous, then yes, I am jelous. But I dont know of what - maybe of what he is good on engeneering because he new what he wants in 6 years old!!! Maybe he is genius. Or maybe I am jelous cause I have not that tallent to make that buble from nothing. When I red my thought was that almost all what he written was lies. If it wasn't then I imagine him like from some soap operas - perfect family, little kid is smart. It all sounds too perfect to be truth.

yeah good PS I needed help

yeah good PS I needed help with mine and this really help me to get started.
I would appreciate any help on PS and maybe the things you'd wish to change after looking at it again: rsdragon14@yahoo.com

oo ur from greenwich which

oo ur from greenwich which part?!What school aswell!?

Sad times.

Lol you got accepted into Imperial for Mech eng, yet you went to bath?

I only recently decided I want to go into engineering, I always wanted to go into Business, but a degree in that isn't very credible so I decided to go with engineering since I'm good at Physics, Chem and Maths and an engineering degree could really show employers that I can think in the way they want me to in order to participate in a business effectivley and efficiently.

Though I'm very flustered now cuz I had a bad test in Chem and Phys (got a D in P1 lol even though I got an A in P2 and Mechanics) and ended up with B's in them instead of A's so I'm pretty annoyed and on top of the fact that I can't write as passionate a statement as yours without lying is bumming me the hell out :/

Your personal statement was

Your personal statement was very nice, you knew what you were talking about. To all of the haters on his personal statement, how about you all write a better one and get an interview at Oxford University then sit there and talk shit about other peoples work. Do yourself and everyone else a favor and shut up. Thank You.

That was great personal

That was great personal statement. I'm applying for mechanical engineering this year. can you help me to do a personal statement?
my email: peekbrittney@yahoo.com

u forgot the title

should i title mine?
what do youse think?

I think that this is a Great

I think that this is a Great personal statement, at least you show that you have passion for your subject. Well done I say

cool story bro

cool story bro

where does he say hes six?

where does he say hes six?

yaeh thats good

yaeh thats good

Where does it say that he

Where does it say that he wanted to be an engineer at six?

BqjmqJwy

I truly appreciate this blog post. Awesome.

Sir, if you statement is

Sir, if you statement is bullshit or it is the truth. I really enjoy reading it. If what you say is the truth, you should continue to pursue your dream. And ignore what others say.

oxford doesn't just base

oxford doesn't just base acceptance on your personal statement, it also requires the grades..idiot

its rubbish

Its rubbish

that was great man

my name is justin from zambia,i wat do machanical with nuclear engineering at the university of leeds,i wat u man to help me with the personal statement by email,my email is doeshupreschool@gmail.com

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