Teacher Tips For Writing A Personal Statement

The personal statement tips and advice below is kindly brought to you by a sixth form admissions tutor with many year's of experience in helping students with their UCAS application.

1. The UCAS form may be the first and the last word

Don’t worry if you’re not invited to interview after you’ve sent off your application. Many universities do not interview for a majority of subjects. 

You’re only likely to get an interview if you’re either applying to Oxbridge, and/or for a competitive course such as Medicine, Veterinary Science, Physiotherapy or Law

Realise that what you send off on your UCAS application has been endorsed and accepted by us, your teachers. Therefore your performance has to match what you say about yourself.

When you go about drafting how to say it, you have a chance to examine your performance; and hopefully you will not compromise teachers by asking us to endorse what you know is not true.

You may, on the other hand, need extra help, e.g. in Oxbridge applications, Medicine; and it is our practice to provide back-up written support in such areas, in addition to our reference on the UCAS form.

2. Explain why you have chosen your course

Obviously, this can cause problems since all 5 courses you have chosen will have slightly different content. But please try (where possible) to make generally true comments about the type of courses you are applying for.

A good chunk of your personal statement should be taken up with reasons why you are applying for this subject. Check the content of the course, and write down how all your skills, experience and knowledge make you a suitable candidate. 

This will provide you with a solid argument as to why you will excel in it and why the university should offer you a place.

If you are invited to interview, you can score points by elaborating exactly what it is that you like about that particular institution's course.

3. Include your work experience

Obviously, at this stage, I am allowing for the fact that you have further things to add to your form, on account of not yet having done the above activities. These include any work experience placements.

At this stage, try to predict what you will learn from these things, even if ultimately you will want to adapt your draft to take new experiences into account more systematically.

4. Think about style

A pernicious type of language has crept in recently, where one develops a horrid air of self-congratulation ("I am very good at" etc.) Unfortunately it is our job, not yours, to say whether you have worked hard, been punctual or are very good.

I cringe when I read statements such as, "I am a very keen student" or even, "I have taken my education seriously." Would you say if you hadn't? Which is not to say that all of you have: some of you have been lazy and under-achieving, on occasions (apologies for being so blunt).

However, it's up to us to decide how much of that we can hide, and still keep our self-respect; or how much we can praise you for your attitudes and work over the past 6 years. That is our job when we write your reference.

5. Cut unnecessary words

"All the way through my educational career..."

" In my long time at ****** Grammar School..."

(Even) "In my life with the school..."

These are not just a few isolated examples; almost everyone writes something like this in their first draft. Just say, "At school,...." or "At St. John's School,...". Keep it short and to the point.

"During my period of work experience, I..." is another example of this pomposity. 

Just say, "In school work experience, I...".

Other awful airy-fairy phrases include: "Away from school," "I ventured abroad" (i.e. I have visited...) and "I have given due consideration to my next course of education."

Remember, you only have 4000 characters in which to squeeze your personal statement - don’t waste valuable space with unnecessary vocabulary.

This leads to...

6. Avoid hyperbole

The art of OTT!

Please don't say, "I have vastly enjoyed ..... " this or that (French Grammar, Work Experience,..... you know, that sort of thing!) 

Just say you enjoyed it, and then go on to say what you learned from it.

"Numerous conferences" would have to be really quite a large number, when almost invariably you mean two or perhaps only one.

"I have read many, many horror novels" is another memorable offering.

Again, don’t waste space when you don’t need to.

7. Watch your grammar

In short, grammar has been diabolical on occasions. 

"Outside of school" is not English. 

In this country, it is still normal to say "outside school." "Doing my studying" was another gem we once had.

Look at your English style, and ask yourself whether it is really necessary to revert to standards well below what your English teacher permitted two years ago.

Cut out I'm, I'd, I've, etc. They are for informal modes of communication. 

Always use formal English for your personal statement.

8. Show some expertise and detail

If you claim to know about Art, for example, you must prove it. 

I have seen many wholly-unconvincing attempts to show knowledge of Art, Travel, Architecture, Philosophy, Aeronautical Engineering, etc. 

On the other hand, it is impressive if you can show knowledge of wider cultural areas, even though you are not expected to be a complete expert yet. However, you can convince the admissions tutors of some level of expertise, forethought and knowledge through careful reading and discussion.

What is an engineer? 

Make sure you know, before you say you want to be one.

9. Don't show signs of amateurishness

It is possible to sound laughably amateurish in some areas, I'm afraid. 

One student grudgingly agreed that he did a little reading in his spare time (an English Literature student).

Incidentally, has it occurred to you that reading horror novels is not evidence that you should be studying English Literature? 

Some people seem almost determined to "lead with their chin." 

Imagine the person reading this at the other end! Don't lead with weaknesses.

10. Don't play yourself down

E.g. "Although only achieving a fairly mediocre standard,..." or "Although I don't really like Science all that much,..." or "On the whole, I get nowhere with such practical tasks...".

Other examples include:

"I struggled at first,

"I'd have preferred a different work experience"

"I've at last managed to become independent"

"I've now started to show more commitment"

Then there is the approach of describing what you didn't like about aspects of your current or previous studies. 

Avoid it unless you want universities to reject you.

11. Avoid adding too much detail

Don't tell them it's the Ritz Snooker Club that you attend. In Manchester. 

Who wants to know that? 

The same goes for your Scout Troop or fencing company you spent a week with on work experience. 

Just say, "a local ..."

On the other hand, it might be important if you feel that you went to a highly prestigious company, or one that is absolutely central to your hoped-for profession, e.g. in Civil Engineering, or Aero-engineering, etc. 

That is not superfluous.

Redundant phrases also look awful. 

If you say that you "... support Fulham FC, and regularly go to their matches at ..." it just looks as if you are trying to pad out your form. 

Don't even say you go to a lot of their home matches (and don't use the phrase "a lot" at all!).

You need to somehow link this activity to your course. 

Repeating other information on the form

Don't tell the universities which A Levels you are doing or what grades you got at GCSE; they can see that for themselves in the Qualifications section.

But by all means RELATE the A Levels you are doing to the course that you are applying for in some detail if possible: i.e. in comments such as "My mix of Arts and Scientific A Level subjects has ..." 

or

"During my A Level studies I have enjoyed focusing on the technological aspects, which I believe are my strengths and will prepare me well for ..."

12. “I enjoy socialising” (avoid generic cliches)

If you sink to this level in your personal statement, I frankly don't think that you deserve to go to university. 

They just are not interested in what types of pub/nightclub you go to.

This would be a million miles from what you should be talking about, and suggests a lack of thought about good things that you could be saying about yourself and about your future hopes.

Ironically, though, they do want to know that you will be a convivial, interesting person to have in the department for three or four years!

13. Don't write anything everyone else will

For example, don't spend several lines talking about your love of Terry Pratchett or Steven King! 

Let’s face it, who wouldn't be able to put that in? You’re supposed to be elucidating the ways in which you are special, a little different; not the ways in which you do what about 15 million other British people do.

Mention that you read newspapers, journals, if you can. 

If you are not reading these, then it is quite honestly time you started doing so. 

"I enjoy keeping informed about current affairs" and subsequently relating it to your subject, would be a good move.

14. Discuss your current studies

Mention individual aspects of your A level work that have proved interesting or important, or that you have applied to the world outside, or indeed to the course that you want to do.

Explain why you have enjoyed these particular topics and, if possible, offer your own thoughts and ideas. This makes for good discussion if you are invited to interview later on.

15. Talk about your responsibilities

Try to show the value you have gained from being a prefect, if you have, or in any other position of responsibility.

Some sense that there's satisfaction in helping with the smooth running of the school, and giving back a little of what you yourself have been given, as well as the enjoyment of helping others to succeed, contributing to a community etc. 

16. Include your interests and achievements

Don't be falsely modest. 

There is nothing wrong with admitting that you are good at something.

Don't forget to mention (as long as it’s true) that you won this or that area championship, etc. 

Two recent 6th formers forgot to mention they were World Junior BMX champion, and London Junior Dinghy champion!

However, don't say you like music, or reading. 

Give details. Show breadth. Give specific examples, e.g. what you last read, bands, composers that you like. (Be sure that you can back it up in an interview).

Travel: if you have been abroad, say so, show what you have learned from this. 

Interests can include: photography, theatre, creative writing, cycling, discussion groups, public speaking, scouts, guides, organising school activities, religious groups (again, be specific).

17. Ask yourself: what is a university?

Really advanced point: there needs to be a sense that you have asked yourself what a university is for, what study is for, what you will gain from a period of Higher education.

In other words, what would a course of study do for you, how would meeting people from new kinds of backgrounds unfamiliar to you, etc.

What will you find in a university that you don't find in school? (e.g. vastly increased library and laboratory resources, greater variety of age, background, experience in your fellow students, far greater independence for you to decide your work patterns, vastly increased recreational activities, etc).

Give a sense that you are looking forward to expanding your own horizons, learning new things, working hard at a topic that is really your own choice, gaining from the expertise that the HE Institutions have to offer.

18. Tell them what you have learned

This is the key point to get across when drafting your personal statement. 

Whatever you write about; your lessons, your hobbies, your travels, your work experience, it is not how good you've been (that, as I said above, is for us to say) but what you have learned from the activity that really matters and impresses the admissions tutors.

19. Highlight your intellectual Skills

Warning - these skills need to be thought through a little carefully by Mathematicians, since their subject is a little different from all the others.

  • Divergent mentality (looking outward to the widest possible range of sources for academic inspiration).
  • The ability to connect different insights in a theory
  • Analysis
  • Prioritising
  • Learning
  • Ability to handle a number of different types of activity at the same time
  • Creativity
  • Concentration
  • Seeing a long task through to the end
  • Questioning type of person
  • Good at making observations
  • Manual dexterity
  • Strong IT skills applied in all your areas of work
  • Memory
  • Self-critical
  • Pick up on little loose ends, details of a problem and generates solutions or new ideas from that
  • Competitive - likes to lead
  • Enjoys swapping ideas with others - working in a team to get results; allocating tasks to each member of the team
  • Synthesising material from a variety of different sources
  • Research
  • Troubleshooting
  • Finding alternative solutions to the same problem
  • Using different media - internet, books, people.

Not all of these will be relevant to the course you’re applying for, but gives you an idea of a few that you may want to include in your personal statement.

For each one, make sure you give an example of how you applied it as either an existing skill or a new one you learned from your work experience placement, etc.

Further information

For more information and advice on writing your UCAS personal statement, please see:

Best of luck with your application!

Comments

teacher's advice on personal statement

This is the best advice I have read so far on writing the personal statement. It is clear and makes sense - very helpful. Thank you!

Some of this is a bit harsh

Some of this is a bit harsh though, don't you think? 'If you sink to that level, you don't deserve to go to university.' And some points I would never do, like changing 'during my week of work experience' into 'in my work experience'... it sounds lazy. Just my opinion though...

unhelpful

his has to be the most unhelpful advice I have found yet. It is badly written and contains many inacuracies!

this teacher has to be anonymous

because he/she has no empathy...
I know so many who are great at writing personal statements and got into great school and also did well on exams, but all they did when they are not in school is excessive amount of alcohol and sex.
You can say someone's personal statement isn't well written but don't judge who deserves to go to an university or not. You cannot possibly know the person who wrote the statement that well. It's only marketing and good products can have bad marketing while bad products can have great marketing.

You didn't think to proof

You didn't think to proof-read before publishing harsh criticism of student grammar...?

I also enjoyed the sections titled 'Amateurishness' and 'Cut pomposity'. How poignant.

Oh dear

This is terribly written and unclear. And whilst it does include some helpful advice, the majority is self-contradictory. Got very frustrated while reading this - hope this man has no say in admissions.

This is brilliant. I laughed

This is brilliant. I laughed so hard.

just spent so much time

just spent so much time reading this n was preparring to make alterations to my PS but when i read the comments below, i got stuck. i came here for some clarity but now, im confused & annoyed!

Make your mind up!

In one section you advise against saying you're good at something, then further down state that there's nothing wrong with doing so. Confusing for students, particularly as you offer very few suggestions as to what they should include!

unbelievably helpful. thank

unbelievably helpful. thank you so much

I feel like there are some

I feel like there are some interesting and helpful comments on here but unfortunately their value is decreased by how bitter and rude this is. Students writing a personal statement are worried enough without bitter comments. I understand that students need to know the truth but I feel like this has been written in too harsh a tone to be taken seriously.

I love it. Want more.

I love it. Want more.