Psychology Personal Statement Example 1

From an early age I have been intrigued by the human mind and how it works. This interest has been enhanced through my study of psychology.

Although I have only studied this subject for a relatively short period of time, I have enjoyed the variety the A-level course provides and I feel I have had a sample of different fields of this subject.

I have particularly enjoyed studying comparative psychology because I am interested in how the human mind can be explained in evolutionary terms and how we can be compared to non-human animals.

I have always enjoyed mathematics, both learning and application. I have relished the course I have taken at college as it has a variety of areas and the opportunity to study different branches. I have particularly enjoyed areas of pure mathematics that I have covered since commencing A-levels and I have developed my enthusiasm for algebra by applying it to different problems.

I also feel that my statistical background will be advantageous to my psychology work. I have enhanced my assessment and evaluation skills through my A-level in Religious Studies, particularly the modules on philosophy and ethics. I feel that my study into ethics is advantageous when applied to the highly problematic field of psychological research.

My logical approach was also demonstrated with my AS-level in economics which gave me the opportunity to interpret data and the effect different factors have on a situation.

I demonstrated my people skills when I undertook work experience at a local special needs school after I had completed my GCSEs.

This week gave me the opportunity to assist teachers and carers with large groups of children of different ages and abilities. This included helping heavily disabled children with Physical Education lessons, autistic children with art classes and aiding pupils with severe epilepsy to do basic numeracy and literacy.

I also helped a group of teenagers, most older than myself with a range of physical and learning disabilities, to do basic cookery. I found this week very rewarding, although it was both mentally and physically taxing as children had to be supervised, and often assisted, at all times.

My part-time job at a doctor's surgery has made me more a responsible individual as I deal with patient confidentiality. I have also become more confident and gained a great deal of common sense as I deal with, and reassure, members of the public.

In my free time I enjoy participating in a variety of different activities. I am a member of a local gym which I attend several times a week, I am a keen horse-rider, I regularly go on skiing holidays and I have recently started Salsa dancing. I have also participated in Bronze and Silver Duke of Edinburgh Awards and hope to start my Gold Award.

I particularly enjoy the planning and undertaking of expeditions as they are physically challenging and encourage teamwork. I also enjoyed the 'service' required for the awards.

For my bronze award I helped at a local Brownie Pack and this included helping to prepare activities and going away on a 'Pack Holiday' residential weekend with the girls.

I was able to do this through my links with Guiding, I was a member of this organisation for ten years and was presented with my Baden Powell Award, the highest achievement that could be gained by a Guide.

I am a keen musician and I enjoy the clarinet, gaining Grade 2 with merit 5 years ago before focussing on pieces that I enjoyed including those in a Jazz-style in 'the Peter Brown Band'. and I have been a member of several choirs, the highlight being performing Honnegar's Joan d'Arc in the BBC Proms in the Albert Hall as a member of the Royal Liverpool Philharmonic Youth Choir.

As a member I also sang in the Royal Liverpool Philharmonic Hall, the Liverpool Cathedral and on 'Songs of Praise'. I am an active church member and I regularly volunteer at fund-raising efforts.

At college I am a charity representative. This position of responsibility involves fund-raising and selecting charities that the college supports, a role which I take seriously and enjoy doing.

For my silver Duke of Edinburgh award I volunteered at my local Oxfam shop for sixth months. I enjoyed meeting members of the public and working with others volunteers to raise money. I have also taken part in my church fund-raisers and I am currently training for the Liverpool Ladies 10km Run next year in aid of a local hospice.

I am a logical thinker and this, combined with my enthusiasm for the human mind, leads towards a future in a scientific field of psychology. The combination of my interests logically suggests a career such as that in ergonomics and this idea has been encouraged by a recent meeting that I had with team of psychologists concerned with Health and Safety.

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A good statement, however

A good statement, however opening sentance is very unoriginal

The only suggestion I would

The only suggestion I would make is to rephrase sentences to eliminate the word "I" in most cases.

Good job otherwise

'From an early age I have

'From an early age I have been intrigued by the human mind and how it works.' ....really very cliche of personal statements and not original. I didn't really find anything that grabbed my interest to sustain my reading in your statement and I fear that in top universities, many applicants will echo your achievements and your statement, therefore, will be overlooked.

theres too much information

theres too much information here about your A-levels...everyone applying for psych has a-levels so its not really that impressive. the rest is pretty good though...although it worries me that you have pretty much done everything i have...doesnt make me as original as i thought :s

clarinet grade 2 is very

clarinet grade 2 is very unimpressive...apart from anything else it just shows that you gave it up...not the dediacation they're looking for.

this person just makes

this person just makes themself sound like an over-acheiver, in a bad way and they just list it all which makes it very un-interesting.

Psychology comment

Your spelling and grammar need some attention!!!

I thought it was excellent

I thought it was excellent

Impressive achievement but worrying

This seems a great statement, but mine too is basically identical. Worrying...

ok

Very bland. here is a continuos repeat of "I" which seems too self obsesive and comes across in a bragging way. There is nothing in this statement that really grabs my attention"

I agree.. Too many I's..

I agree.. Too many I's..
I also don't think this reflects much passion for the field or for your related experience. Make it more exciting:-)

good

i think its very good

it was good

it was good
i hope you get into the university of your choice

i thought this statement was

i thought this statement was very good! well laid out and i disagree with whoever said 'overachiever'. this kind of PS shows uni's ,in my opinion, that thios person is dedicated to their work and likes to aim high s they believe they can achieve it, just what Uni's are looking for. it certainly helped me with my statemnet in terms of layout etc!!!

sarah149

one word...outstanding

It's good, but it is quite

It's good, but it is quite lengthy, well over the 4k character limit.

i think its really good, i

i think its really good, i agree the opening sentence is unoriginal however. this has really helped me with the writing of my personal statement

I agree with everything put

I agree with everything put here, although I did find it easier to know where to start once I seen it.

I haven't achieved a lot to

I haven't achieved a lot to ineterst my reader! i have just started living in htis country!

This person has practically

This person has practically done everything that I have!! Good statement, however it's rather monotonous, a bit more could be done to spice it up a bit.

Its similar to what ive done,

Its similar to what ive done, but just a litle better. What does the clarinet have to do with Psychology?
Otherwise a pretty good personal statement. Which university are u applying too?

"I" alot

Not bad, however there are a GREAT many sentences that begin with 'I'. Variety is the spice of life...

this is quite a good

this is quite a good statement, however it is rather unrealistic due to the vocabulary and the style of writing. If i were to read this as a university enrolement employee, i would have the impression that it is not written by you, but has had lots of help.

good job!!!

good job!!!

the word I is repeated way

the word I is repeated way too many times, we know that its about you.

"this is quite a good

"this is quite a good statement, however it is rather unrealistic due to the vocabulary and the style of writing. If i were to read this as a university enrolement employee, i would have the impression that it is not written by you, but has had lots of help."

Really? I wouldn't think so at all. I think this individual has a wonderful vocabulary and a very clear writing style. As others have already said, a little more originality may be useful and it may be better to speak in the first-person less, however if you're doubting whether or not an 18 year old has written this alone then I think that says more about the 18 year olds you know than anything else.

ok

This author uses the word a little too much. Overall is alright; however, there is some room for improvement.

This personal statement was

This personal statement was good.
Many people have commented that this personal statement is not enthusiastic enough, i would say if this is not enthusiastic enough then what would be?

I agree with the styatements

I agree with the styatements about there being too many 'i's but the statement about 'overacheiver'. Thats the whole point of the personal statement the unis cannot interview everyone so this is each persons oppurtunity to sell themselves. You have to big yourself up in these otherwise the university won't believe the pitch your trying to give them.

Quite a good statement though

I stronbgly disagree with

I stronbgly disagree with whoever doubted the vocabulary to be genuine. I myself feel if anything it was somehat lacking in variety. I would also like to point out the the use of the word advantagous twice in the same paragraph. There are plenty of synonyms to to use and the fact that you have used it in the samer context in the same paragraph merely points out the limit of your vocabulary. Morover, i felt it was dull dispite it covering a wide range of topics.

i wrote a first couple of

i wrote a first couple of paragraphs while i was standing about at work, it sounded exactly like that and mine was WAY boring to read...

very well put

very well put

Some of the comments related

Some of the comments related to this statement are amusing to someone like myself who finds enjoyment in analysing peoples opinions. A lot of these comments smack of the breath of people with little or no self esteem :)

Great statment cheers

I used this as a basis to write my own statement and was offered places on all five of my choices

Good Statement. I do the same

Good Statement. I do the same A levels and have lots in common e.g. gym..duke of edinburgh..Jack Petchy...

writing my personal statement wont be as hard as i thought

i liked it

i liked it

enjoyed

you use the word enjoyed way too much :D

I think its good

I think its good
BUT
i agree wiv others who say that you add "i" too much.
Is this for real btw? Looks a bit too much but if it is, sorry i said that and way to go!
Yh and also i looks over the limit

reads like a shopping list

reads like a shopping list and you've done a lot of the same things as i have :s

One thing "wrong" with it is

One thing "wrong" with it is you havent talked enough about Psychology... and have talked too much about yourself... It should be mostly psychology and why you want to do it at university, and then a little bit about yourself and what makes you unique. Otherwise, the use of language is brilliant and really shows your intelligence, there is nothing else i would really critisize :)Hope you get onto the course, and the university of your choice. :D

Good attempt however.......

a good attempt however,I Adds a very monotone nature to the statement. there is not a lot that jumps at the reader. this statement seems like one that would be echoed by many other students as was mentioned in an earlier comment.

This PS has far too much

This PS has far too much focus on the extra curricular activities - there should be a lot more mention of their specific interests in areas of psychology and why they are interested in them. Also, the intro is very cliched and as others have said, too many 'I's that mean it doesn't flow very well

inspiring

well i personally liked it and your idea of using ethics in solving psychological problem is really logical because i always do so and get success as well.what if we combine the psychological term with human energy transmission?hows one's thoughts hits powerfully on other's mind and no psychological expression works at that point of time?

Disconnected, Boring, Bragging

I am in the process of writing my own personal statement for a graduate school prep class. As I read this personal statement something my professor said kept coming to mind. He said "Show them how great you are, don't tell them." This particular personal statement made many broad remarks such as "I am a logical thinker" etc. but had nothing to back up these statements which made it sound like the statement was basically b.s.ed in my opinion. I also don't believe that it flowed well at all. There was a constant mantra of "I'm really great at this...and this....and also this" yet, these things were unrelated to each other not to mention psychology.

Comment

I would put your achievements in your CV or let them read about them in your academic record. The statement of purpose is an opportunity to tell them about the you that isn't so cut and dry. Let them find out who you are as a person and why you're worth working with.

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